It is not uncommon for our thoughts to get stuck in the mud — spinning like a wheel over and over again in our minds. These thoughts often replay the what and the why of the divorce. Over time, they become what we call “stories” or “narratives.” Unfortunately, these explanations usually do not help. They actually can perpetuate hurtful feelings, especially if they are harsh and critical.
Read More
I recently had one of the most moving and powerful experiences of my career with a high-conflict divorced couple and their 7-year-old child (identifying information has been changed). Filled with tremendous gratitude, I want to share it as an example of why it is so important to be intentional, careful, and collaborative when explaining divorce to children.
In this case, the parents have been living separately for almost 2 years. The initial separation immediately followed a violent episode that involved the police. As a result, an order of protection was in place precluding the parents from being in the same room, emailing, or calling each other. Read More