Divorcing Parents | My Divorce Recovery

Young Adults With Divorcing Parents

I’m very pleased to share a new project that I’m working on through an organization called FamilyKind. The aim is to develop services for young adults whose parents are divorcing during their young adulthood — many of whom experience issues as they’re developing their own relationships in adulthood.

Parents Living Together After Divorce

Some time ago, I read an article in the Washington Post entitled, “My Parents Divorced Yet Continued to Live Together.” The author, Mekita Rivas, whose divorced parents lived together for 10 years post-divorce, wrote about the confusion and complications of their choices and the impact on her as a child.

I’ll Call You Back — Unless I Was Once Married to You

Recently, a colleague reached out to one of her clients and heard the following voicemail message:

Hi, this is Donna, sorry I missed your call. Please leave a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible. [pause]. Unless I was once married to you.

The message’s message is clear: speaking to an ex-spouse is not something that Donna (or many people) want to do. Read More →

Graduation Season: Are You and Your Former Spouse Ready?

College graduation season is upon us. There is less hands-on parenting with college-age children, and many have matured into young adults. Yet, regardless of a child’s maturity, it is important that parents do not neglect their responsibility to proactively ensure a special experience — one that is untarnished by awkwardness and conflict. Read More →

Telling the Kids? Sit Down and Talk it Through First

I recently had one of the most moving and powerful experiences of my career with a high-conflict divorced couple and their 7-year-old child (identifying information has been changed). Filled with tremendous gratitude, I want to share it as an example of why it is so important to be intentional, careful, and collaborative when explaining divorce to children.

In this case, the parents have been living separately for almost 2 years. The initial separation immediately followed a violent episode that involved the police. As a result, an order of protection was in place precluding the parents from being in the same room, emailing, or calling each other. Read More →

Successful Mediation Often Requires an “A and B” Approach

Divorce is challenging and difficult to recover from — often because parents become stuck in battles of A vs. B. An A vs. B mentality inherently creates a scenario of right vs. wrong. In other words, if A is right, then B must be wrong. Read More →

Looking Through the Eyes of a Child Whose Parents are in Deep Conflict

When we think of the ripple effects of divorce, we tend to think about the effects on the immediate family — the children of the divorcing couple in particular.

Divorce not only affects the nuclear family, but extends from generation to generation. In this article, I will share a colleague’s story about the profound and devastating effects of divorce on her and her family. Her hope in sharing this, as is ours at My Divorce Recovery, is that parents can focus their energies on progress and teamwork — rather than conflict. Read More →

Resolving to Create Deep Peace for Your Children

January was “National Child-Centered Divorce Month,” and we can take this opportunity to look in the rearview mirror and ask ourselves what type of parents we have been. Are we parents who provide our children with the best we have to offer—including fostering the healthiest relationship possible with the other parent? Read More →

Turning Holiday Breakdowns into Breakthroughs

During this past Halloween, I was reminded that this holiday is often a flashpoint for conflict between parents who are divorcing or have already divorced. In many of the families that I work with, there were issues around the timing and act of trick-or-treating, costumes, dinner, etc. Read More →