Divorcing Couples | My Divorce Recovery

Uninviting Divorce’s Third Party: Guilt

Whether you’re initiating divorce, it’s being initiated by your partner, or it’s a mutual decision, it comes with a whole host of feelings including anger, anxiety, sadness, and guilt. Guilt can be profound, and can impact our relationship with our children, our ex spouse, and even ourselves.

Guilt can weave its way into our psyches from many perspectives. For example, divorce may cause children to feel confusion, sadness, and anger. It can be hard to look at our kids and see that the decisions we make impact them in a way that is upsetting. Read More →

Safety Without Borders

I recently had the opportunity to visit Switzerland. In between marveling at the mountain peaks, lush valleys, and charming architecture, I could not help but think of the country’s legendary neutrality—and how some of the children I know here at home could benefit from some neutrality in their lives.

Adults have many freedoms and a whole suite of rights that come with reaching the age of majority, but children are dependent upon adults to provide them with an emotionally safe place to grow up.

Especially children caught in the middle of a high-conflict divorce. Read More →

You Are Family First, Divorced Spouse Second

People commonly confuse a divorce with the end of a family. The two are not synonymous.

Marriage is created when two people enter a marital union and become spouses.

Family is created when children come into the picture and the spouses become parents.

Divorce is only the untying of the marital bond. The responsibilities, commitments, and love that come with parenthood continue for the rest of your lives. Read More →

The Invisible Children: Adult Children of Gray Divorces

{Read in 2 minutes} The topic of the recent New York Times article Never Too Old To Hurt From Parents’ Divorce is one that receives too little consideration: the so-called “gray divorce.”

We give plenty of thought to the effect of divorce on young children, resulting in ample research and accessibility to counseling. That is a good thing, to be sure. But what about divorcing couples who are older and their children are already grown? Increasingly, divorces occur after age 50. How do those divorces affect the adult children? What help is available to them?